Can one feel empathy without feeling love?

People without empathy: When you don't care about other people's feelings

Last update: 13 September, 2020

There are people who illuminate our path, and then there are others who darken our path and thus make it difficult for us. Likewise, there are people who would do anything for us and people who wouldn't even lift a finger to make us feel good. The fact is that each of us connects differently with our fellow human beings in every context. This results in relationships that enrich our life path and others that cannot be said of. Examples of the latter are relationships with people who lack empathy.

Have you ever noticed that there are people who don't understand that you are making mistakes? Have you already dealt with people who do not consider your thoughts and feelings? These are people without empathy; People who do not want or cannot put themselves in the other person's shoes.

Empathy is the ability to understand another person's interpretation of reality by perceiving their feelings and becoming aware of them. Of course, not everyone has this ability, which is why in this article we want to talk about how empathetic people are, what disorders can be associated with them and how we can best behave towards them.

The less empathic a person is, the fewer friends they are most likely to have, as empathy helps grow as a person and relationships flourish when you put yourself in each other's shoes.

What people without empathy do not

People without empathy are not able to adopt certain attitudes, because they do not have the ability or the interest to understand the feelings of the other person. Since we unfortunately have to deal with people who lack empathy from time to time, we would like to show you below, what they generally don't do:

  • Consider other people's feelings: People who are not interested in others doubt their feelings. That's why they behave coldly.
  • Have compassion: You do not feel the urge to relieve other people's pain or suffering.
  • Caring for others: They don't care about others, either because they're self-centered or because they don't care what happens to them.
  • Act sensitively: Even when we tell them what we are thinking and feeling, they show no interest in acknowledging and understanding what is going on within us.
  • Apply trust: Since they do not perceive what we think and feel, people without empathy also do not know what to expect from us.

If you pay attention to these characteristics, it will be easier for you to identify people without empathy. Keep in mind that there are distinctive subtle differences in every type of relationship.Some people are little, others are very empathetic.

Without empathy and selfish

People without empathy do not slip into the shoes of their counterparts. Because of this, they do not pay attention to the feelings and thoughts of others. One of the most noticeable traits of this personality type is their selfish demeanor. People without empathy can appear very selfish because they only think about their own goodand put the needs of others aside. Thus, they usually take advantage of situations by ignoring other people.

In addition, they are very reciprocal. But only in the sense that they only give when they receive something in return. So you are not acting selflessly. In relationships, they are only concerned with their own benefit. Their lifestyle is based on manipulation.

People without empathy can seem very cold-hearted to us, because we experience unpleasant situations with them in which we simply feel misunderstood. This is because they only think about their own well-being. It is about People who aren't good friends because they don't connect with others.

Disorders related to lack of empathy

We can all act without empathy at times. But there are people who have this characteristic. Some mental disorders are closely related to a lack of empathy, such as:

  • Narcissistic Personality Disorder: These people are self-centered and pay more attention to themselves. Unfortunately, they forget their fellow human beings. The lack of empathy with this personality disorder comes from the fact that the focus is only on yourself.
  • Psychopathy: People affected by this disorder cannot adapt to social norms and find it difficult to connect with others, which is why they are not empathetic.
  • Borderline personality disorder: These people are usually emotionally unstable, which is why they are rarely able to maintain authentic relationships. They find it very difficult to understand and empathize with how others feel.

When we try to explain to these people why their reactions are hurting us, they usually don't understand and even make us feel guilty by turning the tables and insisting that we did wrong. Caution is advised here because the lack of empathy can cause great suffering in empathic people.

How should we deal with people without empathy?

Some lack of empathy not only find it difficult to understand us, but they also manipulate us to get what they want. In the following we would like to show a few approaches how we can deal with such people:

  • Set limits: You decide how far these people can go with you. Don't let them overstep your limits.
  • Choose your friends wisely: If you feel like that one friend is only concerned with their needs, then remove them from your friends list. He won't do you any good.
  • Be determined: Communicate what you want to say in the best possible way. This is how you express your feelings clearly. However, you should be careful not to confuse a person with no empathy with the difficulty of getting what you want to say right.
  • Distance yourself when you find that there is no emotional connection: If you feel that your thoughts and feelings are unrelated to those of this person, it is best to distance yourself from them. Most likely, you are dealing with a person with no empathy.

Extremes get us nowhere. Sometimes we make mistakes and only see our own interests, which doesn't mean we're not empathetic. But it is very important that we know who we would like to have in our environment, whom we place our trust in, because this is the only way we know who we can count on in bad times.

Indeed, people with no empathy do not care about the feelings of others. You are unable to put yourself in their shoes to understand what they are feeling and thinking. In addition, they cannot look beyond their own nose and thus remain in their comfort zone.

Avoid people who influence the course of the conversation in such a way that you ultimately feel guilty. With this, they aim to use you to get what they want. This makes them controllable and cold-hearted people who neither clearly express what they are feeling nor understand your current situation.

You might be interested in ...